We are always so quick to judge our experience. We have a body experience and jump to a conclusion that we are ill or need painkillers. Or perhaps we get sacked from our job and then assume this means we are not good enough. A curiosity for what’s within ourselves is dulled for many of us, functioning more or less from a head place that critiques our experiences and then reaches for the medicine cabinet.
If we were to enquire and explore our world and ourselves with an open, curious attitude rather than certainty, we might discover a truly magical field of consciousness that is constantly unfolding and mirroring itself within and around us.
So what stops us trusting in the power of our bodies and our experience? Is it the voices of our parents, our teachers, our culture or even the pain we experience when we see the world in us? It’s good to recognise that so much holds us back sometimes, and sometimes its just being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
If we couldn’t exist in that world, we couldn’t acknowledge that challenges are important and difficult. Our fear of losing ourselves, getting swamped in the ocean of awareness or not liking what we see, these are just some of the very valid, invaluable fears that with exploration can lead us back home. In essence, everything has levels of validity, and this increases when explored.
So what happens when we don’t move into a curious relationship with ourselves? Well if it’s part of our path to explore this relationship, invariably it shouts so loudly at us that we can’t ignore it. The ‘disturbances’ in our life increase, strange things start happening to us – sometimes really strange things – and we get unusual symptoms that can’t be diagnosed.
Perhaps something that’s been bugging us for ages is constantly being heard by ourselves in our conversation. A dominant attitude in our world is to repress the unexpected, our mistakes, stuff that happens that doesn’t go along with the plan or what is deemed correct and proper. When it happens we have a voice inside that says ‘you idiot, what a huge mistake you’ve made’.
But what if we were to listen and trust that whatever is happening is on some level perfect – while also, on another level, completely imperfect. Is it possible for something to be perfect on one level and imperfect on another at the same time? Even if we couldn’t see it right there and then, and even if it didn’t ‘feel’ perfect, what if at a deeper, inherent level in us we just ‘knew’ that it was perfect for our soul growth? How would that attitude change our life?
If you could then make a practise out of it, in every moment, would you love the disturbances as the zigs and zags that unfold into something special with time. Could you, would you love them more than the castle towers because you would see the beauty in the waiting, uncertainty and struggles – a rare quality in a world which prefers to polarise, marginalise and reject the negative.
So how would we begin this journey? Perhaps by consciously exploring our internal and external world. We might ask for our body to show us a signal, let the Tao within our body flow internally. We might experience something internal that we dislike, but we would be willing to know more and go deeper, we would be open to inhabiting the motivation and intention behind what’s happening.
We would invite ourselves to be with it rather than resist and fight it. And if we felt the resistance and fight to do this, we would then invite this deeper as part of the story and message. If alongside this invitation we receive a visual image or picture, out of the blue, then we might follow that unfoldment firther.
We might experience strong sensations, a need to move in a certain way or an inability to control a certain way of moving. The message might come in the guise of a chance utterance from a friend, or the lyrics to a song you hear that hits a cord, or the next advert you see, or the surprise appearance of noticing the moon and sun in the sky at the same time, or an awareness that comes to you in the slowness of the morning, or a feeling that overwhelms you perhaps.
We would work to establish and enhance this kind of connection to our environment and ourselves which strongly grounds us in a consensus reality, but also allows us to integrate the world of the dreaming, the field of oneness, to see it as part of our experience.
From this might slowly spring a deeper sense of responsibility which knows that we are always intricately interdependent and connected to one another. This understanding can create big shifts in our ability to feel and be Unconditionally loving. Which essentially, is where we all want to go.