We have a New Moon Eclipse at 10.57 am GMT on 11th August 2018 in Leo. This is the final eclipse of this series. Despite the copious amounts of Sun blessing us this Summer, this really is a time of darkness, where we can feel immersed in the depths of our own unconscious.
Not only is it dark, underworld time, but it also feels barren, like there is no growth. It is reflected with the earth also, just look at Europe from the sky and all you see is mustard – green is nowhere to be seen. Perhaps this the sacrifice of the earth to the earth so that new life can arise. When we are in the darkness of the underworld, nothing can grow or is meant to grow.
It is as though the Goddess has withdrawn within herself, in sacrifice to herself (sacrifice was an ancient ritual rite to secure good times), to give birth to new life. But, this isn’t an easy straight-forward process, especially if we hang on and resist the process of change.
Mercury is still retrograde, turning direct on 19th August, forming a conjunction to this Eclipse, but more closely involved is Pallas Athena – one of two Goddess influences. The other is Black Moon Lilith, who has just moved signs and forms a conjunction to retrograde Mars to less than a degree. This a very curious set up.
At the surface level, this could easily be a time of misunderstandings and extreme reactions or behaviour. With Mercury retrograde figuring so strongly there’s lots of potential for misunderstandings and miscommunication, or at least communications that seemingly make no sense, at least on the surface.
However I would hasten to add that everything makes sense if we look at the underlying messages, signals and patterns at this complex time. There is a lot of meaning in the seemingly nonsensical, always.
Underneath the seeming chaos, miscommunication and altered states (of confusion, suffering or rage), there’s a lot more going on and we would be wise to pay attention to anything that seems too mad or crazy to be valuable. The value is always in that which we hate, marginalise or find disturbing. It’s the way the universe communicates to us, trying to get our attention.
Something is trying to emerge from the underworld – we are not quite there yet, but it is on its way. Perhaps around or just before Mercury is preparing to go direct, we’ll have a sense of what that new information is.
What is really emerging from within these uncomfortable processes? We may feel cloudy, angry or like we don’t know who we are anymore, but within this seeming mess, we are being revived. It’s a deconstruction, death process – where we get taken a part, or brought into contact with our bones. It’s like an initiation process, into the Goddess, through the power of the dark Goddess.
From the highest place in heaven, the Goddess journeys to the deepest darkest underworld – think of Inanna’s descent. From the extroverted, active energy to passive, inward, inert energy. All the current retrograde planets are forcing us to slow down, go in and down. Venus will also be retrograde in October, more on that another time, but note that this is yet another descent that we will take.
Mars, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, Chiron and Pluto are all currently retrograde. The only planets not retrograde are Venus and Jupiter, and of course the Sun and Moon which never retrograde. You don’t get much more underworld than this.
Nothing changes without sacrifice – this is the basis of all blood mysteries which create and maintain the cycle of life. It is known to modern physics, the basis of psychology and the alchemy of transformation. The process of death, sacrifice, decay and rebirth.
It is a simple reality (avoided by the new age) that changes and life more generally demand sacrifices – we have fled from this knowledge – not wanting to face the pain of being reborn into our unique authentic selves, or separate from the systems that would otherwise keep us locked into doing things the ‘right way’.
We as human beings in a body tend to stay identified with whatever we are closest to and rarely find much relief in the partial enlightenment of meditations and energy work etc etc, where we see the pattern from a higher perspective. The reality is if we really want to evolve, we need a lot more than meditation. Anyone that tells you otherwise is just spiritual bypassing and not in reality.
The process of real change is a powerful and intense one. When coupled with the process of ascension, it becomes a continual process of intense change that forces us to offer up what we hold dear. Nothing is sacred with the process of ascension. The sacrifices we make change the balance within our entire system, but not necessarily where we want or desire change to happen.
You know when you are in the process of ascension as you are constantly facing that which you don’t want to face. You are constantly being asked to reinvent yourself and let go of that which has outlived it’s purpose. You are taken into aspects of yourself that are very difficult to understand. The complexity can feel overwhelming.
Many are in this process now, but we can find a sense of renewal and reconnection through journeying into the powerful, potent, primal forces of the underworld, since they break up old patterns, creating even the death of an entire identity. The reality is that we would rarely go to these places voluntarily, and our soul needs us to go there.
As we learn to lose our dependence on the material, patriarchal version of God / Source / whatever you name it, and reclaim the power of the Goddess in its most basic feminine of process we learn to surrender and sacrifice more and more, releasing ourselves from that which has dominion over us.
The depotonisaton of the Goddess which happens when we relate through the distorted masculine aspects of ourselves has caused a lot of the feminine to be repressed. We are learning to return to the dark, unacceptable, feminine aspects, in all their darkness and power, and renew our own potency.
Incidentally this is not about using the feminine as a defensive armouring shield (as Athena did – she is present at this New Moon) but reconstruct, strategise, rebirth ourselves through an inner process (instigated through the retrograde planets). We are reconnecting with the full range of the feminine, in it’s whole spectrum, and especially the instinctual elements.
When a woman comes out of her hiding, and starts to embody the darker feminine, to stand her ground, in all her instincts – with herself or those around her – it’s initially an exhilarating but scary process. It can feel like we are too demonic, not refined enough, rageful, furious. There’s always a voice that says “I can’t be that”, “that’s too much for people”. But there’s no escaping it, it has to be part of the process. Making contact with this these aspects are where we are at now. This is the start of the liberation.
All these tired, old, worn out patterns of relating, our all accepting, fragile, playing it cool, especially in relation to people (especially men) are in the process of being sacrificed. If you have been working on yourself seriously, then you are in the process of moving out of 3D consciousness into a higher consciousness expression, where these patterns now can’t be maintained.
While this is not a particularly challenging month for relationships it is a challenging time all round for relationships. Why? Because men are also, often against their will, being challenged to also go to these dark, underworld places in order to meet their partners with the same complexity and depth. Men are not used to going to the depths. Most have not needed to go into their repressed depths, for they have been supported by the outside world without inner dissonance.
Increasingly, there is no adequate wholeness pattern for men to relate to, so they are forced to relate to their own depths, often though the women they are with – a very uncomfortable process. This can bring up a fair amount of suffering on both parts of the equation – as well as resistance. Women are finding that men can’t always truly go there with them, and doubt in relationships surface. Can this person really support me and be willing to change alongside me?
The pussyfooting around, cringing and protecting ourselves and the other in our relationships is so up for change. We only ever bother to get hurt when we hold the other as dear as the necessity of speaking our own truth, which is the Goddess in all her power. When there is no equality in relationships, it is very difficult to speak with the objective, detached energy of the dark Goddess.
The inner descent, like Inanna’s descent to the underworld, which many are going through, feels deep and primitive, totally taking us a part. We are coming into contact with our bodies in a new way, we are becoming embodied. We are re-membering that we can’t make radical changes with grace and ease unless our bodies are a number one priority in our lives.
While some descents loosen our rigidity and raise our energy, the radical descents that feel totally enforced totally reorganise our personality. Yet all descents provide entry into different levels of consciousness which ultimately enhance life creatively.
It’s not about trying to lessen these states at the moment, through a fixing process, believing them to be bad or wrong and in need of ‘healing’. While there are always aspects within them that require healing, the revival that happens through totally owning a radical deep process is far more empowering, and what we need right now.
As with every experience that is not classed as ‘normal’ (the new normal needs to be redefined under the current astrological influences), there is a strong critic or judger around telling us not to be anything too unfamiliar, out there, not normal or unacceptable.
Where do these ideas of what’s right and wrong come from? How are they propped up? It’s obviously in the larger system in which we live, but unbeknownst to many who are spiritually awakening, it’s also in the many spiritual new age teachings and writings. They do a good job of polarising us further, just another expression of the same old polarity and fix it quick – this time without the makeup or nice clothes. Just love yourself, they say. And what if you can’t? I will repeat – the process of ascension and awakening is a very intense, deep process that occurs over a whole lifetime. This is the awkward reality that many are not ready to face or hear.
The immense pressure that comes from trying to be more – of what’s better, more acceptable, less confrontational, more toned down – is more of the problem than the actual energy that needs expression. Suppression is never ever an answer, it just delays the inevitable, yet we tell just about anyone who expresses anger, or anything extreme, or even individual, that it is not ok.
This creates many issues on levels most are blissfully unaware. Whole groups in society get put down and told they are not enough and that they are perpetually wounded or damaged. I’m thinking particularly of those with what medicine terms psychosis or those labelled as disabled (diff-abled). Likewise these states cannot be ‘healed’ by simple shamanic or the new age approaches. They need something entirely different from spiritual communities. They first need to be welcomed as part of our diversity (as a very first step), and seen as an equal process of becoming. Where are the spiritual communities and new age books that truly support diversity?
The more we try and get rid of the inherent power held within our altered, uncomfortable reactions and states of consciousness, our diversity, the more we are falling into the trap of suppression – precisely what the ‘system’ wants us to do.
Our gut, instinctual responses are needed in the world, as we spend most of our watering down our reactions for others so we are acceptable to the social structures we find ourselves having to navigate. This needs to change, and is changing, so this is the time to get in touch with these deep processes at hand.
Mars retrograde in Aquarius is breaking down a lot of the conditioning, tribal patterns, that which we have bought into – showing us where we allow ourselves to belong to the collective in ways that feel deep down very uncomfortable. The suppressed rage at being contained and suppressed, that hasn’t seen a look in for years (even lifetimes), is arising, quite erratically, as to be expected, certainly it cannot and should not be contained, it holds our power and needs our attention.
It belongs to the collective as much as to our personal soul history. It’s arises from the distorted dynamics of power and abuse, that is tenfold in our world. We are not here to just ‘feel better’ – we are here to ascend, but this is about dealing with all this rage, its real, not pushing it to the side further and pretending it’s not spiritual enough. Steps must not be skipped.
Once again, the ostracised dark feminine – represented by Black Moon Lilith at the New Moon – is so hot on the tail of retrograde Mars. She will not be held back. She has just moved into Aquarius. The sign of the collective, the sign of humanity. It’s an opening process to our power as women and men, through the voice, eyes, senses and heart of the Goddess.
While the dark Goddess takes us into the suffering and profound sadness, she also suffers it and relieves it. Remember to give your fears, your anger, your hopelessness, and all your impossible emotions and thoughts to Mother Goddess and Father God. Have faith that if you give this whole thing to them, they will guide you and take care of the all the issues in the most perfect way.
