Thursday 7 May – Full Moon in Scorpio 10:45 GMT
Saturday 9 May – Mercury trine Pluto 13:19 GMT
Sunday 10 May – Mercury trine Jupiter 14:36 GMT
Sunday 10 May – Sun sextile Neptune 16:38 GMT
Monday 11 May – Saturn retrograde 4:09 GMT
Monday 11 May – Mercury square Mars 7.33 GMT
Wednesday 13 May – Venus retrogrades 6:45 GMT
Thursday 14 May – Jupiter retrograde 15:32 GMT
Friday 15 May – Sun trine Pluto 6:49 GMT
Friday 15 May – Mercury sextile Chiron 20:22 GMT
Sunday 17 May – Sun trine Jupiter 15:40 GMT
Wednesday 20 May – Sun into Gemini 13:49 GMT
Wednesday 20 May – Venus square Neptune 23:03 GMT
Friday 22 May – Mercury conjunct Venus 8:41 GMT
Friday 22 May – Sun trine Saturn 12:02 GMT
Friday 22 May – Mercury square Neptune 15:43 GMT
Friday 22 May – New Moon in Gemini 17:39 GMT
Cards For This Full Moon
We have a Full Moon in Scorpio at 10:45 GMT on 7th May 2020 at 17°20 Taurus-Scorpio axis. This Full Moon is in emotional Scorpio. This Full Moon is reorienting our relationship to darkness, in and of itself, in a myriad of different levels. Get ready for a ride on a huge new wave of awareness.
The main events is Saturn, Venus and Jupiter retrograde, on 11th, 13th and 14th respectively. Pluto went retrograde 25th April. When we have a cluster of planets turning inwards, there’s a lot of reframing, revisiting, remembering to do. Venus retrograde happens less frequently, it is the main event. She is also in a long, month long square to Neptune as she is moving very slowly.
This is bringing through a lot of confusion, at the lower expression, but if we can harness it, it brings us creativity and connection to our spiritual selves. We might though have less of an idea what is real, true and false, to a point where it seems like it probably doesn’t matter anymore. I certainly feel like facts cannot easily be ascertained now and an openness to all possibilities is important.
The journeying of Venus retrograde, highlight the myth of descent in the underworld. Three myths are assigned to Venus retrograde but the oldest one is the story of Inanna, the Sumerian Venus, which allegories its astronomical cycle. This myth, written on clay tablets, was discovered in the sands of modern Iraq.
Inanna is the Sumerian counterpart of Venus, the Goddess of fertility and abundance and the most important deity of the times. She has morning and evening phases which were indicators of agricultural productivity. Food was the most important thing for our ancestors, food basically meant life.
The myth starts with Inanna travelling to the underworld to visit her sister Ereshkigal, the Goddess of the Underworld. To the Sumerians, Venus disappearing under the horizon (going retrograde) meant Venus went to the Underworld. Inanna passes through 7 gates to the Underworld and she has to remove a piece of clothing or jewelry at each gate. She needs to let go of her old identification of the self – which is precisely what we are doing collectively at this time.
When she finally arrives in the Underworld, her sister decides to kill her, this is the phase when Venus is conjunct the Sun and a new Venus cycle starts. To start anew, a part of us must die. The goddess of the Underworld who strikes Inanna dead is nothing else but our own shadow side, which we need to learn to integrate. Emissaries from the Earth were sent to rescue Inanna and so she is resurrected back to Earth. This is the phase when Venus appears again in the sky, this time as a morning star.
This is a journey of metamorphosis, changing from one state of being to another, and a new beginning. Venus retrogrades are about letting go of the old, when old lovers or unfinished things from the past come into your life – so that you can finally complete with them. The theme is about letting go of something of value. This is the phase we are currently in.
With this Venus retrograde occurring in Gemini, we have the theme of duality, of dark and light, and all wider Gemini themes springing from that. So this is what we are revisiting and reframing on a collective level.
So this Scorpio New Moon, just before the Venus retrograde, is a bit like an initiation into our shadow. So we might all be feeling it arise at this time. Its our relationship to darkness, and to light. Its a very confused relationship on this planet. I’ll try and explain my understanding to kick off this Venus retrograde cycle, and I’ll speak more specifically about Venus retrograde in the next post.
Lets begin with yin and yang. The yang is masculine, the light, and the yin is feminine, the darkness. The creativity of the feminine, within the darkness has been locked away, trapped and suppressed for many thousands of years. The complexity within the darkness is not understood, not processed, not seeing the light of day. And we collectively and individually have been suffering from that.
Darkness is the creative space of womb, where birthing, life is formed and created, but it has multiple layers and levels to it. We have so much resistance to going into the darkness, to working with the womb within, that if we go into we will be taken over by this portal, like that the darkness is bad and wrong and that we can’t give it our power. Men also have wombs, on an etheric level.
So darkness holds one side, although as we know, it also holds the light as well, it holds all the colours and within the darkness is a beautiful being of light, pure, innocent, hidden away protected, and very much forgotten. This is because I believe we have forgotten how to see the light within the darkness, we have forgotten that the masculine and feminine belong together, and are one. You could say the twin flame story is also connected into this whole Venus retrograde, but that’s for another post.
Darkness has been deeply misconstrued on our planet, we often use that word to describe what we fear. And lightworkers, by their very naming, are said to align with the light. And so the new age does perpetuate the ostracisation of the dark and polarisation the two.
But the darkness has many spectrums within it as the light does also. While the darkness can feel like it holds this terror or fear, it can also be very calming and soothing. Children can feel very safe within the darkness, if they are reminded of it’s true nature. Conversely light is loud, it’s electrical and has a starker quality. Both light and dark have a further polarisation within them, which again is not often acknowledged or understood. The light is often associated with the masculine, and patriarch, with doing right, progression, following the path of spirit, crusading.
But sticking with the darkness, which is far more repressed and trapped, we need to understand that it’s meaning has been manipulated. Towards the beginning of time, before street lamps, people would welcome the dark, it was part of the cycle of day and night as seen as integral. It was celebrated. Rituals were done at night, it was an important time. It was not labelled as the time for ghosts and fear. We often feel like we shouldn’t be out at dust, when the bats come out. We are told that most car accidents happen at dust, when we can’t quite see as clearly.
Why do we feel like this about the descending, transitioning, haunting, deathly, sober, darkness? And at this time, lightworkers say ‘hold on to the light’. Don’t enter the darkness, the negativity. Don’t entertain it. And so the darkness is held hostage.
And so to shadow. Shadow, through the teaching that we should fear it and our lack of acknowledgement of it, refusing to see or own it. Fear of it has twisted and forced it to feed from dark waters. We have pushed it away so much and put it in darkness. We see the darkness through one dimensional eyes, that it’s bad and wrong. We have forgotten the true power of the darkness, and have demonised it instead, giving it a name that it does not want to aligned with – evil.
If we imagine darkness itself as a feminine being (although darkness is more androgynous), you might say the pain of this has cut darkness off from her own feelings, she is in disconnection from even itself. It feel empty and hollow on the inside and has pretty much had enough of carrying this shame that it has been forced to carry. It wants to open up and be accepted, to be more and have some sort of connection, to come our of it’s banishment, so it is no longer a hungry ghost.
Darkness is not just feminine, although it represents that, it has many aspects to it, it’s very old and evolved, then very childlike and innocent. All these different phases of life to it. It’s always shifting and changing. It’s like a masquerade, a puppet, shapeshifting. It carries all these projections, masquerades, a harlequin, fascade, puppet, but its not what it is. It has all these levels and elements to it, it can’t fully integrate into those aspects of itself, because there is something missing. And it stems the flow, it’s stuck.
It wants to be loved and be a part of love. It wants to know that love flows through the energy of it. It wants to feel that again. It was dismissed and not wanted. All the feelings that people can’t feel get put into this place and live. Darkness is the rubbish bin, a dumping ground for us. Darkness doesn’t take over people, it doesn’t reach out. People just take from it. They steal from it, as no one cares for darkness anymore, abusing it and using it anyway they want.
So it was a lighter form before it defouled, it did flow, it had many shades, it was fluid. But then it stopped flowing, no continuity or flow… as our sense of time shifted out of phasal relationship. This has been a gradual process. Since the ego and fights starting causing the separation of light from dark, as though it’s not in there.
Darkness is seen as sucking the light out of things, of stealing light, but in fact we steal and dump on it. Darkness actually holds every colour within it’s spectrum. Think black holes also. With so much mass present in such a tiny volume of space, they create a region around them where the curvature of space is so strong that nothing – not even light – can escape from its gravity. But this is only from a boundary point, it doesn’t consume light from all.
This black hole concept has led to an incorrect picture that most of us have in our heads about darkness and voids: one where black holes suck all the matter from outside with no exception. We think of black holes as cosmic vacuum cleaners, consuming everything that dares to approach their vicinity. This idea of darkness as all consuming is fed by this incorrect perception of black holes. Voids are actually places of fruitful gestation. The feminine is this, but we have tainted this source of life with something devouring.
We are approaching a time of going to the underworld, into the darkness – globally and individually. Integration of things happens in the darkness, we don’t need to feel consumed or in fear, we can feel soothed by this place, if you look at your perception of it. This is a space where we can actually heal. But we must be prepared to not push it away now. We have a long period of this integration, healing time, connecting to the more lunar type consciousness. Which I did videos on ages ago – here’s the link.
But I find much confusion in the New Age around the concept of darkness. The great awakening makes people think all they need to do is sit there holding the light and that it will all just happen. Perhaps I am over simplifying, I know New Agers do more than this, but sometimes they do not explain fully what they are actually doing and so it gets simplified and then ridiculed, for good reason. Plus it’s going to take a lot of courage, as we will see, to face what we do not want to face. Face what we have done to the darkness, the feminine, the feeling world which honours life, as much if not more than the light.
Holding our light, is an easy way out, there’s so much complexity. And to tell others to not get immersed in the negativity and bringing their vibration down is simply a pile of BS. So there’s no much judgment around going around that.
One light worker, not sure where she gets it from speaks of it this way; there’s dragon riders, who have an understanding of the dark and light and have balanced it. They ride the dragon. There’s those at the beginning of the awakening journey who have just awoken and are getting onto the dragon. Then there are those that are just holding onto the light and they are holding onto the tail and will get thrown around everywhere as they have nothing to anchor themselves onto. They haven’t journeyed into their own darkness yet through there are own rejection of it.
Lets talk more about evil, as it’s a big taboo in psychology and hardly anyone knows what it actually is. Evil is hurt, really, deep down. What we put out and can’t integrate within ourselves often becomes hurt on others, or the world. Different cultures have mapped out different layers of evil, understanding the different dimensions of spirits, of beings, thoughtforms. For example, a shaman in a particular culture might say with a plant you can expect to go to a realm with these characteristics. Ancient buddhism maps it in a different way. They actually deeply understand the concept of evil, unlike the western world that simply pathologies it.
We do not yet have a scientific body of knowledge about evil because while the concept of evil has been core to religion for millennia, it is virtually absent from our science of psychology. Science and religion have been considered totally immiscible – like oil and water, incompatible and rejecting of one another. So the world divided in to natural and supernatural. The supernatural, in all it’s complexity is seen as darkness, only explored through the realm of religion that categorises it as evil. Evil has become synonymous with darkness.
Even the very word ‘evil’ requires a priori value judgment, so science has no clue how to approach it, also because of the immensity of the mystery involved – science is largely reductionistic, which is a a left brain, masculine style. They leave the bigger mysteries to the philosophers and theologists.
But we are facing a time when ‘evil’ is being revealed, unveiled, (or about to be), as it can no longer be contained by the darkness as this is not the what the darkness is. Evil needs to be from the darkness, from the feminine, for the feminine to truly be seen in it’s wholeness. The spectrums of light and dark are at their most extreme now.
Satanic demonic energy masquerades as darkness, it is not darkness. And we have created the satanic energies to be bigger than what they are. It’s our creation. It can be dispersed easier than what we think also. It holds no power. We’ve been giving it power. The illusion of satanic forces being powerful, or rather their illusion, is something we need to break.
It is true that the satanic forces have indeed drawn energies to them, human projections and fragmentations are it’s power source. Those forces are only powerful if they remain hidden away. Think Dorothy in Wizard Of Oz and the exposure at the end. Satanic forces are also drawing energy from the light too, to feed their agendas. We cannot confuse that energy with dark and light.
So evil becomes real when we make it real, when we feed it, when it steals the energy from the darkness. And in many ways our desire to avoid pain, individual and collective suffering, and causing hurt in response to not feeling ourselves, mothering ourselves, calls evil into existence. But we also have the power to end it’s existence, but not through burying our heads in the sand but through becoming willing to bear the duress and go into our pain, then the pact made will be voided and annulled and evil will have to look elsewhere for someone else to make it real.
This is currently one big process which is happening on the planet. We have split off hurt and evil as though it doesn’t even really exist, burying our heads in the sand, and therefore denying and resisting It brings it further into reality. We have given hurt and evil so much power by seeing it so one dimensionally, and through believing it so equal to acts of love, and through letting it steal from the darkness. Evil done is beyond all other acts in the name of darkness. That is not darkness, it’s cheap, rip off. It’s not the authentic brand.
There are those that thrive on the energy of pain and suffering. It is hard to comprehend the existence of such beings, and we forget that we are also this. We also thrive in micro, subtle everyday ways, not just on a large scale, through getting a mini rush of power, a pleasure of seeing our power over another, the earth, humans, animals. But for some the pleasure and power derived is in direct proportional to the depth of the suffering they are able to cause. Evil is live backwards. Biochemically you could say its a backwards energy where pleasure is gained from giving pain. Our culture has gone so far away from nature, with no interest in the costs of that level of destruction. Inevitably it has to be processed, this is what is happening now.
We went this way because people globally have a deadness of emotion, a closed heart and so they ruthlessly and brutally assume power over other beings, whose very cells pulsate with feeling, just like everything in our beautiful world also. As I’m understanding it, the earth, and it’s inhabitants have taken hostage, enslaved, to some degree. But there are other layers behind this 3D reality, that is currently being denied by the mainstream.
When we are connected to something larger than just us (that’s not living in a globalised world by the way), then we have a kindred connection with all life. To get there, to that place, it usually requires an initiation, into the darkness and the reality of what that is (more about that in the next post I feel). From there we can move into something transpersonal, beyond our small self. These are ecological experiences, because when we are that connected we cannot hurt each other, or anything else.
When we start to go beyond, into our hearts, our minds and our souls, we come to the imaginal. This is a powerful place. Many shamans have this experience when they journey into deep spiritual experiences. Its deeply healing, pure death-like, and it reconfigures all our life experience, and we have lost touch with all wisdom in our hyper rational culture.
We are not in a rational place, we are in an irrational place. We are dying because we refuse to entertain darkness for what it is and the power of death-like experiences within it. We do not treat the earth or each other as holy. Nothing is sacred.
As we begin to face these dark realities and truths over the next 7 years, of our own shadow, we will be offered or forced into a deep transformation. We have now entered the great transformation, awakening, which is not just wielding love and light.
We are being forced to face our disconnection, and how we have projected or dumped onto the darkness, onto the feminine. How our rejection of the feminine, of shadow, of emotions, of body, is what the darkness now holds for us. And we are vastly and unconsciously in fear of it. We are in fear of that which we cannot open to – at least our small selves is in fear. We sell the feminine out, all the time. We sell the feminine out because of our own hunger, and we end up eating ourselves in the process.
Many are switching off from this awareness, burying heads in the sand. But those that are receiving the call, who are being called into the depth will benefit from going to these places during the awakening, which is the retrograde season – lasting all year, having it’s peaks and troughs. This retrograde season is about remembering and understanding that because the darkness is trapped, we are trapped. This is why we are having some very crazy emotions and experiences at this time.
From grief to pain… the layers are coming off. And deep within this darkness, an innocent, pure, rare, precious child hides in the centre, buried deeply within to protect it and so we do not even know it exists. The evil (and I understand that that’s a word that needs unpacking another time) which has been perpetuated in the name of darkness, is really something different. Darkness has had many accusations and blame directed towards it, so it hid deep within and has many feelings and much complexity.
It’s been waiting for its time to be reawakened. It’s been split off by the world, and now it’s time for it to be re-membered. This little being of the darkness feels very galactic and evolved, and is not at all human. This is what we will discover within ourselves.
The unmasking, unveiling, at all the levels, is not so much about seeing the darkness behind people’s masks of light (although the light is the greatest mask of all), it’s more about seeing the light and beauty behind what appears to be darkness, (our projection onto the darkness). The light is in the dark and the dark is in the light. A bit like Michelangelo’s Creation of Adam, the fingers touching. They just need a reconnection, a re-meeting, coming back together.
Darkness need to be seen, acknowledged and seen, it is no longer going to be a horrible secret. That there’s existence and life within the darkness and that is equal to the light, love and wonder. It is all around everything and demands acknowledgement, it cannot be hidden and locked away, its time to be accepted.
The abuses that have been done in the name of darkness, is not emanating from darkness. If anything it is the sources of light that commit the atrocities! I say this because deception is more rampant with beings of light, than beings of darkness. I spend a lot more of my time, as a therapist, correcting people on their misconceptions around what is light, real, true. It’s hard to talk about but put another way, when someone is truly convinced of their truth because their angel of the light told them, I’m immediately suspicious. The light can be very appealing and attractive and tells us exactly what we want to hear. Those light beings are responsible for a whole lot of the illusion. The darkness is where our freedom lies.
So if anyone wants to control and suppress anyone on this planet, by far the best way to do it is by setting yourself up as a being/person of light; convince people that you are here to do good. Particularly if you can control and manage people in a hidden and behind the scenes kinda way. Either way evil often masquerades as light, we think something is there to serve us, but oh so often we are misguided and need a wake up call. Pausing, asking more questions, sitting with the uncertainty and possibilities seems to be one way of moving out through this. But that doesn’t require us to step back, quite the opposite, it requires us to engage fully with it.
Think how people convince folks that they should be positive and always hold to a positive alignment and to never doubt or think about so called negative possibilities, and just stay in the light. Getting my message? Think a positive timeline… they all say. Where really is this message arising from? Well, I don’t know, but how about we just question absolutely everything and ask to be shown the deepest level of truth.
So the issue lies with not actually seriously thinking about or engaging with anything so-called negative – this is by far more responsible for actual negative experiences happening, as this approach means we never investigate, look to understand or resolve issues at a deeper place.
Lightworkers try desperately to stay in their positive space bizarrely convinced that by staying there it will lead to something better. This is called spiritual BS.The ego has created all this BS, this separation of light from dark. They think they want light, but really, they just want air, as that’s where they are stuck, in their heads. It’s their safe haven as they can’t stomach their feelings or the pain in their hearts. There is no interest in truth, only illusion.
If you can’t accept both sides, all aspects of yourself, then you will never be whole in the light. You have to find the centre and in that place will be all aspects, you can’t just pick one side and pretend you are whole. The only way to be whole is to have all parts.
Most light workers have done their work and are riding the dragon, having gone into their shadow and so they are balanced and a source of truth in all this. Just sort out whom has done the work and whom has not.
I spoke last week about being an individual at this time, I was referring to the process of individuation, which is not what it sounds to be. It’s the process of the ego self merging with the Divine self. The undivided Self, a soulful connection to life, interwoven into life. That’s all aspects.
What comes up time and time again, across all culture is the idea that what you do to others, you do to yourself. The hurt that we put out there, now held in the womb of darkness, is returned to us. Now our communication systems are so global, we have an entirely different frame for awareness and connection to all the rubbish. We are all in one global washing machine, working it all out. It’s a confusing time and it will stay pretty confusing for the entire month with Venus square Neptune.
The whole issue we have on the planet is about our relationship to dark and light, feminine and masculine. That’s the whole deeper game now that we need to untangle and move beyond. And we have to know our allies in the process – allies human and beyond. We cannot just sit back and wait for it all to pass. We have to question, and question some more.
It’s like we need a change of perspective on this whole dark/light thing. We need more phasal, relationship type of seeing. Where we are aware of the range, rather than this side or that, peace or war. Good or bad. Trump or Gates or Obama. Dark or light, truth or fake. That whole game is taking us down.
Finally, light, in terms of light and dark, is very different to the light of unity consciousness (5th dimension and above). They are two different things. Yin and yang, is the polarisation of light and dark, but there’s something beyond that. And I feel the confusion perpetuates because of this misunderstanding around whats light. Unity consciousness isn’t really light because when you work with higher dimensional being, they are not fairy tale figures of light. The Goddess, the feminine, the earth, holds all the qualities and aspects.
You have to feel the pain to really heal it. And that needs to run deep, you need to touch deep grief, betrayal, rejection, abandonment, it doesn’t need to be an endless stream of pain, definitely not, just touching it is enough. You learn how to die, before you die, and make it your art. Knowing this path will only make you richer as a human being.
We need to work with our shadow and understand what the dark and light is, and the programming we have succumbed to, acquiesced to. The global programming that we have bought into. This is individual work that can be done. Incidentally, if you are feeling all this weird stuff in the collective more than most others, check out your chart, you might find some connections with Neptune or the 12th house, of Pluto by natal, transits, solar arcs or progressions. I’ve seen this as a little bit of a theme of late.
This post was inspired by a long conversation with my friends Cerisia and Tania, a lot of it came from them also, so giving these girls a shout.
The Tarot – The Tower
The roaring of a mighty storm, Thunder and lightening, the raging of the elements, deep chasms opening up – no way to escape. Icy cold hailstorms and flaming rocks of lava, horrible screams of bodiless beings – nothing to hold on to, nothing stays the way it was. Fiery breath, the psychic stage is being emptied. Separation from constricting patterns. A jump into the flaring red sky.
I’Ching – Dispersion 59
This card regulates closeness and intimacy with others – through transparency. In the process, our desires must be mastered, our desires for another are only because we see a purified essence of ourselves in the other. So the process is about re-directing our projections inwards, re-routing our neural pathways, so we gain a higher experience. All our needs and desires of others is our desire for the return to the Divine. As we shed the layers, sublimate, transcend, we go through long processes of integration. How do we stay intimate with others when we are deeply processing internal change? We share ourselves, but as though we were talking to a child – we do not share it all – we do so mindfully, with care for feelings. We hone diplomacy, love, compassion find a common language – and it happens through the heart. It takes care, it doesn’t try and fix, it holds people in their essence. And to be truly intimate with another we must be able to work within ourselves, with the deepest compassion for ourselves and the other requiring fierce self-honesty. Letting go of our sense of an isolated individuality, to quote Richard Rudd “a virtuous relationship is one in which no energy escapes anywhere. The virtue of each heart is eternally bonding those two individuals, so much so that they transcend their individuality. They become love”. It begins with your own transparency – “the aura of love”.
Archetypes – Gnosis
True knowledge is not found in facts and figures in scholarly books on library shelves. Rather, Gnosis points to the deep and winless archetypal wisdom that rises from then felt experience of having touched the unknown with everyone of the senses. Those who are drawn to Gnosis find themselves in esoteric studies, likely involving mysticism, alchemy, healing or perhaps science. Knowing is their calling. Not knowing is their job description. No matter how far the alchemists take their studies, they come to the ultimate conclusion that facts slip toward mystery and soon the mystery results in facts. This card signifies a ‘knowing’ that is life-changing. Once you experience it, you are forever changed and become a guardian of Gnosis. The enteral mystery is calling you… study your passion in deepest way available to you. When dark it’s over intellectualising and liberalising, as well we asking others. When light it’s about contemplating the mystery and unanswerable questions.
Isis Cards – Knot of Isis
Part of your spiritual destiny involves a special relationship with the Goddess. This means that not only do you have the important spiritual task of helping her thrive in the world, but you are afforded her power, protection and abundance, too. You are now deepening your connection to the Goddess.
Free Energy Healing & Cleansing
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Chakra and Meridian rebalances
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Tarot Margaret Petersen
The Human Design System Rave I’Ching Card Lynda Bunnell
Isis Oracle Alana Fairchild
Archetypes Kim Krans
These readings are interpretive and are specific to this time and place. They contribute to an ongoing exploration helping to guide us through these changing and challenging times.
This is not meant to offer a complete, definitive guidance, explanation or understanding.